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Are You Coping With an Undiagnosed Illness?

I'm so glad that you came to listen in on a conversation between us girls =)

Sharon and I were discussing what it's been like for us to live with these "Invisible Illnesses".
Perhaps you can relate to this message yourself, perhaps you have felt misunderstood as you have fought to get diagnosed and validated, that indeed, you do have a real illness. I know how difficult and frustrating it can be when we don't fit the world's view of what we should look like.

But there is Someone Who understands what you are going through.
He knows your pain, your frustration and loneliness. Read on......

Getting a Diagnosis is Often Difficult

For years, Fern, I went from one doctor to another looking for a diagnosis. Without testing me they all told me that I looked fine. A doctor at Mayo Clinic once told me that he recognized a sick person when he saw one ~ and I was not it. He too, refused to do any tests; dismissing me as a hypochondriac. I became a mental wreck over these experiences.

The first doctor who agreed finally to do tests found lupus; though as I've said, it was only in that general category of connective tissue disease. My present doctor has given me much encouragement and help with my diseases.

I've met no one, in fact, who understands what it feels like to be treated all these ways. There's not much understanding out there for invisible illnesses. So it isn't only the physical pain and limitation; it's the mental thing, and sometimes, even the isolation that chronic illness can bring.

But...You Don't Look Sick!

I can feel the pain that you have had to endure Sharon. You are not alone anymore, I understand. For those of us who are suffering from these types of illnesses, known as Invisible Illnesses, it would seem that we all speak the same language. No one can understand what we are dealing with unless they have walked in our shoes.

We feel guilty if we are able to go out and enjoy ourselves for a few hours. We appear to be normal to outside eyes. To be fair, before I became ill, I know I would have thought the same thing. We are not trained, by the media or our own personal experiences, to recognize someone that's ill, unless it's the model we have been trained to comprehend ~ someone in a hospital bed, who looks sick. We just don't fit the model.

Dealing With Isolation

Consider that I am almost sixty one, and for thirty years, have been alone in my little world of pain. I hate it that others suffer, too Fern; but knowing others who do suffer is making me feel less like a "freak" of nature. Isolation is a whole other subject. As you pointed out, sometimes we need to know that others understand our sickness, yet sometimes, we want to give the impression that we are "just fine." For me, knowing that no person around me understood, made me feel isolated, even though others were around. My answer to that I guess, was to try to act like a healthy person so that I could fit in somewhere. But secretly, I'd know that I was being dishonest with myself and others. Isolation is difficult to handle though, and only adds to the list of other problems.

It's up to us to educate our doctors, families and friends. Yes, my friends have gone along the wayside too, but that is part of life. It is natural in this modern age. Long ago, of course, we would have had our family structures intact and wouldn't be so isolated as we are today in our society. We are isolated so much today when we are well ~ being ill and homebound only compounds an already existing problem in society as a whole. We are out of sight, therefore, out of mind.

The good news is that we have each other, and the LORD totally understands what we are feeling...the isolation, the loneliness, the pain, the fatigue, and all our frustrations!! Let me share with you from my journal an experience that I had back in May of 1998:

My Best Friend

Yeshua (Jesus) came to me when I was at my lowest point physically and emotionally.
I had been bedridden for quite awhile, totally helpless and in pain, and was scared. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I had been lying awake for a long time, feeling so alone and misunderstood by my family and doctors. I started to weep quietly, so I wouldn't wake my husband ~ I felt so alone in my pain and suffering.

Yeshua came to me ~ I felt Him in the room with me ~ a very real presence, and He spoke to my heart and told me that He understood ~ He knew every single ache, pain, everything. It was the first time that I was able to call Him my best friend. He is my best friend now, and always will be since this encounter. Every time I have moments of feeling like no one understands, or that I'm all alone, (whispers of LIES of the enemy HaSatan), I remember what Yeshua said to me that night.....it's not true, we are not alone, and someone DOES understand.

We have an Advocate. I have never been the same since....it just doesn't really bother me anymore if I can't make someone else understand, like my husband, even though he tries, no one can understand what this feels like except Jesus, and all of us who are sharing in these sufferings. It is enough for me..unless I listen to the enemy again from time to time......that's why we NEED each other :o)

I pray ADONAI brings others here who are suffering in their feelings of isolation, so they can be comforted. It really DOES help, and is needed, to know we are not alone in this. I can remember too, when I thought I was the only one. I had never known anyone that was ill before *I* got ill! *I* didn't even know how to act!

A prayer for you:

Abba, Comfort all who read this, make Yourself real to them and let them feel Your love and compassion for their suffering. You know our every pain, and we know You understand because You have walked this path of suffering before us. Thank you for understanding and carrying us when we are too weak to walk. I ask for healing in mind, body and spirit for all who pray this prayer and that Your will be done in their lives. Draw them ever closer to You Abba. In Yeshua's Name. Amen.

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